Silence

She forgot. She forgot what it was like. She forgot what it was like to be alone. The harsh reality of her situation smacked her like concrete jumping up from the ground. The silence felt like razor blades at her wrists, the sharpness of it hurting so much and yet letting her know that she was in fact still alive. That damn silence that would not go away no matter the background music, television show, or trite cell phone conversation she had. That silence that had soaked through to her very bone would not be shaken. And the loneliness seamed to be the perfect accessory. The two were a match made in heaven and as they slowly soaked up every inch of humanity within her no one reached out to help, no one realized who it was that crossed their broken road, no one saw the shattered heart that was being mummified by lonely and silent. So when he arrived to "rescue" her he didn't realize what he was getting into and when he pulled her halfway out before he let her drown in silence, he took that last piece of heart and never looked back.

Lessons Learned

I thought this would be simple
Cutting you out of my life severing all ties
But I'm discovering that when you walked out you forgot to disconnect
You forgot to let me go
I can still feel you,
You're everywhere but with me
You sit in the middle of my radio turning every station to a song that makes me think of you
You posess my remote to flip the television to every show I can no longer stand
You're standing in the middle of the field leading that donkey to walk right in front of my car
I even get to watch you erase me from your life like I was never even there.

It doesn't matter anyways I know longer believe
I don't believe in that truth
I don't believe in making it through that dark moment
I don't believe in happily ever after
Those things only exist in fairy tales, love songs, and TBS movies
Not in real life, not in this life, not ever in my life

Closure

It’s gotten to the point of almost comedy!
How you can just ruin me,
With that little flick that you call a remedy.
You think that your emotions will truly shut off?
You think that it is just as simple as snorting that stuff?
Well eventually when you sober up,
eventually when you realize that what you’ve created isn’t enough

You’ll come strolling back in, you’ll re-appear
and swear never more will I do such things,
never more will I pull at your heart strings.

Well this is a risky game you play where you duck and weave away from me
Who knows where I’ll be when you come to your senses
Who knows where I’ll be when you attempt to mend fences.
But I promise you this and I hope that you’re reading
so that you can feel how much my heart's bleeding,
I promise you that when you come knockin’ I’ll be locking the door
and stuffing my ears 'till I hear you no more
So I won’t be tempted, I won’t be distracted, I won’t be ambushed, or even contracted.
To let you back in to trust you again, to say, I love you, to that hallow heart you hold within.

Never again will you trick me and trap me, never again will you get to unravel me.
So get lost, be gone, disappear, go sing someone else your sad sad song.
Because when you think of me and smile to yourself,
when you think of me and go back to that happy place,
when you think of me and get turned on....

Just know that I’m long gone.