Square Life

Concentrate Now, Don’t Lose Your Balance
Now, walk as straight as possible
Don’t miss a trick or you’ll
Lose everything you’ve worked for
Your perfect world will collapse upon itself and that
Balance will never again be obtained

Assembling the Shelving Unit

The trite trepidation of your tendencies.
The futile efforts at understanding
The amount of anguish that boils underneath the surface
It’s as if you are a rubrics cube that is practically solved,
and yet the more often I
slide your pieces, the further from the correct
configuration I travel.
The infinite energy and persistence you require I can no longer give,
However the thought of giving up
and leaving is worse then surrendering everything
I have over to you.
i know the satisfaction i will feel once i have fixed you once you are arranged just as i please i know that you will soon conform to what i need to exactly what i have been looking for the only thing left to decided is how much am i willing to lose in order to get there.
How much of my sanity must I sacrifice for perfection?

Horror

Is that really it? Is that truly all that there is? Are you actually just a brief interlude of molecules that can be blown a part as quickly as you were assembled? That wall that you have created it’s not to be tough, it’s not to shield your fragile heart it’s simply there so that people won’t know that on the other side there is only the depth of a Wal-Mart kiddie pool. You’ve built that wall so that you don’t even have to look at the drought of your heart, so that you can continue forward, thinking that you are simply not settling versus looking at the actual truth of the black void in which you are sinking into. That black horror that will soon consume me, devouring the parts that are still alive.

Why

Why did you do that? Why did you make me believe again, why did you do that to me. I was fine living in my very true reality, before you yanked me out without even asking. I'm not sure where to start with the repairs, my heart or my mind. As long as I remained in control as long as I remained the driver things were fine I know where my heart lies and you were the one who moved it out of that stoney silence and you made it hurt so bad.......... why? My brain could logically see it's way to the end of any romantice escapade, it stayed focused on what it was good at and never ventured, and then you came and swept away all logic and now I have to tell it to go back and it hurts so bad ................. why did you do that? I knew I should have held my stance I knew I should have stayed with my feet firmly planted on the ground, but you made me think I could fly, and now that the ride is over I am falling so quickly back to the earth that I just don't think my knees will be able to take the impact and it will hurt so bad. Why did you do that? Don't get confused I'm not calling you a liar, a cheat, a bastard or selfish. Then it would be easy. The difference is I actually believed that talk, I actually bought into that dream, I actually trusted you and now that you have decided that things just don't fit, I am deserted justifying to myself why you left and the only person to blame here is me. Why did you turn the mirror on me you knew that it would hurt so bad, seeing the ugliness that lives in me. Seeing the flaws of my stone heart and trained brain and you did it anyways ............. why?